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Saturday, April 9, 2016

The Saint of Doubt

This is the message given in the United Methodist churches of the Wheatland Parish on Sunday, April 10, 2016.  The Bible verses used are John 20:19-29.


            After Jesus was raised from the dead, he remained on the earth for forty days before going up to heaven.  In this sermon series, “The After Party”, we’re looking at what the Bible tells us about those forty days.  Last week, we looked at Jesus appearing to Cleopas and his friend on the road to Emmaus.  Today, we look at Jesus appearing to the disciples.
            When we hear that word “disciples”, we tend to think of the twelve, down to eleven now with Judas gone, and in fact down to ten in this instance because, as we find out later, Thomas was not with them.  But in fact, that term “the disciples” is not necessarily limited.  There are times when the gospels specifically refer to the twelve, but “the disciples” can mean more than that.  So we really don’t know how many people Jesus appeared to here.
            It was the first day of the week.  What we’d call now the first Easter Sunday, which means it was the same day he appeared to Cleopas and his friend on the road to Emmaus.  That appearance apparently came first, because we’re told it’s evening when Jesus appears here.
            When we read this story, Thomas is always made out to be kind of the bad guy.  After all, we call him “Doubting Thomas”.  He’s the one who said, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”  It’s not that we think of him as evil or anything like that, but we kind of imply that Thomas must not have had much faith, certainly not as much as the other disciples did.
But look at what John says happened.  Jesus appeared to the disciples and said “Peace be with you.”  After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side.  It was only after that, that we’re told the disciples were overjoyed at the sight of Jesus.
In other words, the other disciples got what Thomas wanted.  They got to see for themselves, and it was not until then that they believed.  So here we are, so hard on poor old Thomas, when all he wanted was what the other disciples already got and apparently needed before they could believe.  If it had been one of the other disciples who was absent, we might well talk about a “Doubting Philip” or a “Doubting Andrew”.
We don’t know why Thomas was not there when Jesus appeared.  I wonder if it was coincidence or if Jesus did it that way deliberately.  Jesus did use it to make a point, after all.  Jesus said to Thomas, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”
Where do you see yourself in this story?  Where do I see myself?  Do you and I require proof?  Or are we able to believe without seeing?
There are lots of articles and books that you can find that set out to either prove or disprove the gospels.  We link to some of them on our facebook page once in a while.  They can be interesting to read.  But ultimately, there’s no way we can prove, beyond any doubt, that Jesus was the Son of God and that he was raised from the dead.  We can find evidence to support it, but all the evidence we produce can be explained away somehow if that’s what someone wants to do.
As always, it comes down to faith.  But you know, faith does not mean the absence of doubt.  As the theologian Paul Tillich once said, “Doubt isn't the opposite of faith; it is an element of faith.”  What faith really means is believing in spite of our doubts. 
Quite often, where you and I are is where the man was who spoke to Jesus in Mark Chapter Nine.  Remember that story?  A man brings his son to Jesus for healing.  He says to Jesus, “if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”  Jesus says to the man, “‘If you can’?  Everything is possible for one who believes.”  And the man responds, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!”
“I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief.”  A lot of times that where you and I are as Christians.  We believe and we doubt at the same time.  But you know, I don’t know if there have been very many Christians who have not had doubts at some point.  Mother Teresa, Martin Luther, John Wesley, John Calvin, Pope Francis—they all had to deal with doubts at various points in their lives.  The chances are, you and I either have or will have to deal with it, too.  And we may have to deal with it more than once.
And I think God understands that.  After all, we’re asked to believe a lot.  We’re asked to believe that a child was born to a virgin.  We’re asked to believe that child was the divine Son of God.  We’re asked to believe that child grew into a man who could work miracles.  We’re asked to believe that man could raise people from the dead.  We’re asked to believe that he, himself, was raised from the dead.  We’re asked to believe that his death can lead to the forgiveness of all of our sins if we only believe in him.  That’s a lot to believe.
And that’s not all.  We’re also asked to believe that God is still active in the world.  We’re asked to believe that God not only will hear our prayers, but God will listen to our prayers and God will help us.  We’re asked to believe that God loves us and God has good plans for our lives and God will guide us to live in accordance with those plans. 
There’s an awful lot that we’re asked to believe if we’re Christians.  And again, we cannot prove any of it.  We can provide evidence, but that’s all.  Ultimately, we have to take it on faith.
And that’s hard.  Because a lot of times we don’t see God at work.  A lot of times, we don’t feel worthy of God’s love.  A lot of times, we don’t feel God’s love and God’s guidance in our lives.  A lot of times, it feels like God is not paying the least bit of attention to our prayers.  And we really cannot see any reason why God should.
But I want you to notice something about Jesus’ statement.  Let me read it again.  Jesus says to Thomas, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”
It is an awesome thing when we can believe without seeing.  But there’s something Jesus did not say.  Jesus did not say that people who cannot believe without seeing are condemned.  Jesus did not condemn Thomas.  He did not send Thomas away.  He did not tell Thomas he was not good enough to be a disciple any more.  There is no indication that Jesus loved Thomas any less or that he considered him any less worthy of being a disciple.
I wonder if maybe one reason Jesus was not harder on Thomas is that Jesus remembered his time on the cross.  Maybe Jesus remembered the time when even he struggled with his faith.  Maybe he remembered when he was on the cross and asked, “God, why have you forsaken me?” 
Jesus continued to love Thomas, and Thomas continued to love and serve Jesus.  In fact, Thomas is considered a saint.  And you know, maybe he’s the sort of saint you and I need sometimes.  A saint who struggled with his faith.  A saint who wanted to believe, but who still wanted to see for himself.  A saint who was able to serve God and love God even if he wished he could have proof.  A saint who understood how we struggle with our faith sometimes, because he struggled with it, too.
Jesus said, “Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”  But there’s a blessing for the Thomases of the world, too.  There’s a blessing for those of us who sometimes have trouble believing when we have not seen.  There’s a blessing for those of us who feel both faith and doubt and at the same time and sometimes struggle with which one is going to come out on top.  The blessing is that God will keep working with us, just like Jesus kept working with Thomas.  The blessing is that God will keep encouraging us, just like Jesus encouraged Thomas.  The blessing is that, as long as we don’t give up on God, God will show us what we need to see, just like Jesus showed Thomas what he needed to see.  And God will say to us, just as Jesus said to Thomas, “Stop doubting and believe.”
God understands our struggle.  But God will never give up on us.  As long as we don’t give up on God, God will keep working with us.  And with God’s grace, we can do what Jesus said to Thomas.  We can stop doubting, and believe.  And then we can respond to Jesus the way Thomas did.  You and I can say to Jesus, “My Lord and my God!”

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