Independence

It occurs to me that I haven’t given you an update on my parents for a while.  As last Sunday was Mother’s Day, and as we just saw them the Friday before, this seems like as good a time as any to do that.

They’re doing--okay.  Dad is ninety-four now, and Mom will turn ninety-two next month.  They’ve been in the nursing home in Armour for nearly a year.  Some days are better than others.  That’s true in every way:  physically, emotionally, psychologically, and every other “ly” you can think of.  And of course, all those “ly”s are connected.  On days when they’re feeling good, they seem to be adjusting to their situation and handling it better.  On days when they don’t feel good, they have a hard time accepting things and wish they could be back in their home.

I imagine that’s all pretty normal.  Some of you reading this may be older and in living situations you did not choose.  And I imagine you’ve gone through some of these same things.  As the saying goes, old age isn’t for cowards, and I know you understand that much better than I do.

It kind of reminds me of what Jesus said to Peter at the end of the gospel of John:  “When you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.”  All of us want to be able to do what we want to do when we want to do it.  It’s very hard when suddenly we have to live on someone else’s schedule, and do what they want us to do when they want us to do it.  It’s not much fun when that happens.

But it’s inevitable.  It will happen to all of us if we live long enough.  There’s no way around it.  Our human bodies are only designed to last for so long.  We can like that, or we can not like it, but our liking or not liking it does not change it.  It’s just the way it is.

But you know, as Christians, we should never really be think that we can do what we want to do when we want to do it anyway.  As Christians, our lives should not be about what we want.  Our lives should be about what God wants.  Rather than doing what we want to do when we want to do it, we should focus on doing what God wants us to do when God wants us to do it.  That should always be our goal.

How can we do that?  Well, it seems to me that the number one thing we need to do is pray.  Pray that God will help us open our hearts to God’s Holy Spirit.  Pray that God will help us submit ourselves to God’s will.  Pray that God will give us the faith to do that even when God’s will is different from ours.  Pray that God will give us the trust to do that even when God’s will does not make any sense to us.  Pray that God will give us the courage to do that even when God’s will takes us to places we don’t want to be and asks us to do things we don’t want to do.  Pray for the ability to believe that God’s will is always better than ours, that God’s plans are always better than ours, and that God’s timing is always better than ours.

So let’s not focus on doing what we want to do when we want to do it.  Let’s focus on doing what God wants us to do when God wants us to do it.  Let’s submit ourselves to God’s will, rather than focusing on our will.  When we do, God will show us the way.