Struggling to Feel Joy

It’s Christmastime.  A time when we’re supposed to feel joy.  After all, one of our favorite hymns is “Joy to the World”.  The angel said to the shepherds, “Behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy.”  Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy.

And I hope it is.  But I know there will be people reading this for whom it is not.  There may be a lot of reasons for that.  Some people are grieving the loss of loved ones.  Some people are undergoing serious health problems.  Some people have lost jobs or have other financial difficulties.  Some people feel very alone and lonely.  I’m sure there are other things going on in people’s lives, too.  When you feel these things, it’s very hard to feel joy.

And society, deliberately or not, sometimes makes it worse.  Because everywhere we turn, we get that same message.  From Hallmark Channel movies to Christmas parties to concerts to lots of other things, we’re told that we should feel joy.  And so, a lot of times people will pretend to feel joy even when they don’t.  They’ll paint a phony smile on their face and wish everyone a Merry Christmas, even though inside they feel like crying.

If you’re struggling to feel joy this Christmas, know that it’s okay.  You don’t have to.  Whatever you’re feeling is okay.  I mean, I wish everyone could feel joy.  I don’t want anyone to be miserable.  But sometimes we just can’t, and nothing the calendar says is going to change that.  And trying to pretend we feel something that we don’t, or trying to pretend we don’t feel something that we do, can just make things worse.  Sometimes, the only way to get past a feeling is to allow yourself to feel it.  As the saying goes, sometimes you just have to feel the way you feel until you don’t feel that way anymore.

Also, if you’re struggling to feel joy this Christmas, don’t be afraid to reach out.  The reason God put us into communities and churches and other groups is so we can be there for each other.  But it’s hard for people to be there for you if they don’t know what they’re going through, so don’t be afraid to tell them.

And if you’re not struggling to feel joy this Christmas, please keep your eyes and ears open for people who are.  Try to find a way to be there for them.  Let them know you understand.  If you don’t understand, let them know that you care anyway.  Let them know that they are not alone this Christmas.  Share your love and the love of God with them.

Joy is a wonderful thing, but love is even better.  May all of us know the love of Christ this Christmas, whether we feel joy or not.  May God’s love surround you during this Christmas season.