Poles Apart

There was a poll recently about what the most polarizing brand names are in the United States right now.  By “polarizing”, what is meant is that there are lots of people who strongly favor them and there are lots of people who strongly oppose them.  There are not a lot of people who are neutral.  Someone either really likes them or really doesn’t.

Of the first ten most polarizing brands, eight of them are news organizations.  They are, in order, CNN, NBC News, The New York Times, MSNBC, Fox News, ABC News, the Huffington Post, and CBS News.  For each of those organizations, there are a lot of people who really like them, and a lot of people who really don’t.  There are not a lot or people who are neutral.

My point is not to tell you what you should think about any of these organizations, or even that you need to think anything about them.  My point is this:  news organizations are, in theory, supposed to report facts.  Maybe you think some of them don’t, but in theory that’s what they’re supposed to do.  And yet, these are the organizations that are the most polarizing.  People have chosen sides about these organizations and either strongly like them or strongly don’t.

It’s no wonder, then, that the country appears to be so divided.  Not only do we all have differing opinions, we really can’t even agree on what the facts are.  And of course, the facts are what form and shape our opinions.  If we believe the facts of a situation are A, B, and C, our opinion will be one way.  If we believe the facts of a situation are X, Y, and Z, we’ll have a completely different opinion.  

Because we cannot agree on the facts, it can be very hard for us to even have a reasonable discussion with someone who has a different opinion than we do.  We hear what they say, but it does not make any sense to us, because we don’t believe the facts that they do.  They hear what we say, but it does not make any sense to them, because they don’t believe the facts that we do.  And so we talk past each other, failing to understand anything about where the other person is coming from.  We cannot agree to solutions to problems because we cannot even agree on what the problems are.  We cannot agree on how to make progress in a situation because we cannot even agree on what the situation is.  And so it seems we move further and further apart.

I don’t have a solution.  But I think one of the things we need to do is to make more of an effort to truly listen to and understand each other.  When someone disagrees with us, we need to try to understand what they’re opinion is based on.  And we need to be willing to explain what our opinion is based on, so they can understand it.

This is not to say there is no such thing as truth and falsity or no such thing as right or wrong.  There is.  I’m not saying we have to accept someone else’s version of the facts.  But if we want to become less polarized and find some form of common ground, we all need to understand where each other is coming from.  That’s the only way we’ll ever be able to stop talking past each other and really have a conversation that leads to coming together, rather than pulling apart.

So if you find yourself disagreeing with someone this week, try to truly listen to what they’re saying.  Try to find out what their opinion is based on.  Try to really have a conversation.  You don’t have to agree.  But maybe, if we try harder to understand each other, we can come closer together.  In fact, if we try harder to understand each other, it might lead to more of us loving our neighbors.  That would be kind of cool, I think.